Sunday, May 17, 2015

Believing in the resurrection more than the darkness

My parents and Stephen's parents generously took us to the beach for vacation last week, during which I was able to spend some much-needed time resting and reflecting. I was able to spend a lot of time praying through why I've felt so heavy lately - so burdened. Burdened to the point of sickness and depression - even though I have a wonderful husband, wonderful friends, and genuinely feel that I am living the way God has called me to live and doing what He has called me to do.

But I just feel so deeply sometimes, and it's overwhelming. My heart hurts for the broken and hurting and lonely so much that I feel sick to my stomach many days. There are days I succumb to what Satan wants - to trying not to care or feel compassion because it just hurts too much. But as my husband and others close to me remind me, my "deep feels" are from Christ. This is Christ. We are not called to feel compassion and do justice because it is popular or good. Feeling compassion and desiring justice are things that all followers of Christ should feel because this is what Christ felt. This is his very heart. So it is good that God has been molding my heart to feel more as his feels. Christ wept for others and was sick at heart for this world, so I should be too.

But - I am often downtrodden in a way Christ wasn't. And from looking at his example, it's become clear to me why: while Christ acknowledged the very real power of Satan in this world and wept over it, he also always acknowledged God's stronger power, and drew on this power to actively push back the darkness around him.


And as I am called to be like Christ in all ways, I am called to be like him in this way also. This is the answer to the weight in my heart. I MUST believe in God's power as much as I believe in the darkness I see all around me. Christ believed in this power and changed the world with his life, his death and his resurrection. And with his resurrection he passed on the power of life over death to all who believe. The power of his resurrection is stronger than Satan's darkness.

The power of evil is real, yes - and it is heartbreaking. As Christ wept over it, we should weep. But Christ also fought this evil with His every word and action and finally defeated it with His death and resurrection. And this same power lives in us - so this means we can defeat the darkness too. We just must believe in his power. The same power that defeated all evil once and for all and raised Christ to life is the same power I am called to draw on today. Amazing. If I truly believe the resurrection is real, it changes everything.

I can get off my knees after weeping and act with faith in God's power. I can act to further Christ's justice and redemption in the world with the knowledge that God WILL move and WILL win in the end. Our work is not in vain. He is at work in us and through us and around us to make all things new, and He will bring His good work to completion. We may not see it everyday, but Light is winning.

As I start to feel the sick feeling of darkness creeping over me, I need only follow the example of the father in Luke chapter 9 did: "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief."

I can pray fervently, then get off my knees and walk in the resurrection power of Christ, crushing the darkness with each step I take.



"In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it."
-John 1:4-5

Thursday, April 2, 2015

His holiness and his humanity

Over the next couple days, we see Christ's humanity - his sadness, his loneliness, as well as his boldness, his courage, his compassion. Every year, Maundy Thursday and Good Friday show me more of Christ, and I come to love him even more. We see his bravery and his deep, selfless love. We see him choose to wash his disciples' feet as he prepares for death. We see him cry out for another way, but choose to die for us anyway despite his fear. His reality and the reality of what he has done for us hits me in a new way each year at this time. And, as usual, there is a specific passage from the Narnia chronicles that comes to mind:

"Please - Aslan,” said Lucy, “can anything be done to save Edmund?”
“All shall be done,” said Aslan. “But it may be harder than you think.” And then he was silent again for some time. Up to that moment Lucy had been thinking how royal and strong and peaceful his face looked; now it suddenly came into her head that he looked sad as well. But next minute that expression was quite gone. The Lion shook his mane and clapped his paws together ("Terrible paws," thought Lucy, "if he didn't know how to velvet them!") -The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe


http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_macyy2biVg1r8kupho2_500.png
http://rebloggy.com/post/mine-lucy-pevensie-screencaps-aslan-movie-the-lion-the-witch-and-the-wardrobe-m/31544441340


Tonight and tomorrow the heavens will be silent, remembering what Christ has done for the world. And I with them. Then on Sunday we will rejoice in the REALITY that Christ has risen and is making all things new:

"...he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, 'My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.'" (Matt 26:39)

“
...when Jesus knew that his hour had come to depart out of this world to the Father, having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end.” (John 13:1)

“And he who was seated on the throne said, ‘Behold, I am making all things new.’” (Rev. 21:5)



Monday, February 23, 2015

It makes me ANGRY - and I think it should.

“I don’t believe the theology of our adoption requires us all to adopt, but it does expect us all to at least consider the possibility of it.” (Jason Johnson)

I agree so strongly with this - but I would go a step further and add that the theology of our adoption in Christ DOES require us all to care about and be involved in adoption here on this earth in SOME way. Stephen and I are among those who do feel called to adopt, and through this past year as we’ve explored that and been in a situation where we almost fostered a little boy, it brought me to tears many times seeing how friends and members of my community - who don’t necessarily have that same calling - stepped up to support Steve and me in so many ways. Everyone is called to care for the fatherless, for vulnerable, hurting children in some way. Everyone. If we don't feel called to adopt ourselves (and not everyone is), we ARE still called to support and promote this issue that is close to God’s heart. Whether through mentoring a child in the foster care system, supporting a family who has just adopted by cooking them dinners, providing resources for birth parents, advocating for policies that support vulnerable children and families....whatever it is, our theology of adoption requires us ALL to be involved in adoption on this earth in some way.

It makes me angry – and I think it should – that adoption is not a COMMON aspect of our church cultures, our communities. We are charged with bringing more of Christ into our world, with furthering His kingdom on this earth – and adoption is a crucial aspect of this. It is actually an injustice, unbiblical, that more churches aren't talking about this, and that more families aren't asking if this is a call God has given them – and if it’s not, that we then aren’t asking in what ways God IS calling us to show his heart for adoption. We must be talking about adoption, how it is an integral part of our faith, and how it should be a normal, integral part of our communities....or else we’re wrong.

I am thankful to be a part of a church and community where this calling to care for the fatherless is common knowledge. To learn more about this call and what part God might be calling you to play, check out DC127.org for some resources.

Monday, January 26, 2015

Hope

The concept of hope has been on my mind a lot the past couple years. Especially this past year. Seeing the brokenness of families, of our government institutions, seeing the anger of broken men, seeing children growing up with absolutely no dreams, no hope....it is hard for ME to have any hope a lot of days. For those of us who are deep feelers especially, it is really, really hard to feel deep compassion and not feel deep despair at the same time.

But God keeps whispering "hope" to me...at the same time that I've been feeling despair like never before, I've also felt more hopeful than ever before, almost within minutes of each other. Because of what Christ has done, I have hope that can rescue me from the despair. Out of all the beliefs in all the world, Christ is the only God who ever made himself man so that he could feel our despair, weep with us in it, and then die so we would not have to stay in it. With his death and resurrection, He defeated despair and the evil that causes it - and one day he will return and make all things as they should be. Even NOW, he is working through his Spirit in us and all around us to advance His goodness and His justice, to spread His Kingdom. He is beauty and glory and light, and he brings joy and excitement and HOPE. He is the answer to the kids all around me who have no hope. We can have hope because he HAS changed everything, and is changing everything even now. Rather than letting despair win, we can tell the kids in our schools and our friends and our neighbors that they can dream and they can HOPE.


"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope." (Romans 15:13)


Thanks to Tim Willard for his devotional today that spoke a lot to this theme:

"We are children of the Wind...Lord Jesus, Let us not give in to a culture of cynicism and nonchalance, but recapture the romance, glory, and joy of our faith - belief that flies us home, belief that sails us into the beyond."

Tuesday, December 9, 2014

A season of Advent and Brokenness

How can we still have hope with everything going on around us? Here are my reflections on that question, as we grieve over Mike Brown and Eric Garner in this season of Advent:

The link above will take you to Shared Justice, the blog for which I wrote these reflections. Here is the original, extended version of those thoughts, if you prefer that :)


Advent and Brokenness

As a white woman, I have known much privilege. Until the past few years, I never had any reason to doubt the functionality of our justice system or the reliability of law enforcement. I had no reason to doubt that our system works well for most people – because it has worked well for me. I have been, and still am to a large extent, largely ignorant of my own white privilege.



But thankfully, over the past few years, God has led me to relationships that have begun to open my eyes. I now have dear friends who are black.  My husband and I mentor a 12-year old black boy, whom we love as if he was our own flesh and blood. My husband cares deeply for his hundreds of former black students. We both interact with black people daily who we know and respect. We were close to fostering a young black boy this year, whom we also love deeply. We know there is a good chance we might one day adopt a black child.



Having these relationships – having my heart moved – has opened my eyes. Let me be clear: I love my country. I have no doubt in my mind about how blessed I am to live here. I know many, many law enforcement officers, judges, and regular old civilians like myself who seek what is RIGHT with all their might everyday. I know our system functions well much of the time.



But I also have seen firsthand the ways it fails. Without a doubt, there is systemic injustice that exits in our systems – and our culture. We cannot be afraid to acknowledge this. We cannot be ignorant of the fact that white privilege exists, and that it prevents many of us from seeing the depth of the injustice that exists around us. It doesn’t mean our entire country is flawed, but if we do not recognize that our system is imperfect – it was imperfect when it was established and it is imperfect today – our country WILL fall apart. If we allow injustice to exist, it will only increase. It is time to recognize the glaring evils that we have allowed to survive, and demand change where it is so desperately needed:



When the vast majority of our failing schools are filled with minority children, something needs to change. When nearly 80% of black children cannot read at grade level by 8th grade, something is wrong. When nearly half of all black children under age five are living in poverty, something is wrong. When a black man is choked to death by a police officer on video and that officer is not indicted for murder, something is very wrong.



There are a lot of reasons why these inequalities and injustices exist, and not enough space to delve into them all here. But the reality is that they do exist - and we all play a part in allowing it. We cannot be afraid to admit this. We need to let go of our own cultural perceptions and biases. We need to not let ideals based on our own comfort rule us. We need to get outside ourselves. We need to do what it takes to make sure inequality does not exist, as much as it depends on us. Let’s be involved in our schools, our communities. Let’s have relationships with those who are different from us. Let’s love our neighbors – all of them – as ourselves. We need to listen. Let’s feel what our brothers and sisters feel.



This is what Christ commands of us. As his followers, we are called to be the first ones bringing injustice to light. We are called to lead the way in naming and destroying anything that is not what God intended. In Christ, we are all equal and if one of us is suffering, we all suffer. We cannot be silent. We cannot allow defensiveness or anger to rule us, but rather compassion and humility as we seek change:

“Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all. Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience…” (Colossians 3:11-12)

We cannot fight anger and injustice with more anger and injustice. We must reflect Christ’s perfect way – listening in humility, recognizing where we’ve been wrong in meekness, being patient with those who are angry or hard.



But while Christ was humble and meek, he was not silent. He was not afraid. He was bold. He blazed with zeal and passion, and burned with anger when he saw wrong. He did not, and does not, tolerate the mistreatment of ANY person made in His image. So we should not either.



What lights Christ on fire and makes him upend tables in the temple should cause us to do the same. Watching in silence when injustice is active around us the same as if we were doing it ourselves. Christ makes it very clear: we are not to tolerate sin. And the fact that in our country today the majority of our failing schools are filled with minority children who are pushed through a system in which they are destined to fail – this is sin. Because ALL are made in God’s image. Though we might not be physically pushing children into the “school-to-prison pipeline,” though we might not be one of the officers murdering an unarmed man, though we might not be one of the citizens who has actively racist thoughts – if we do not ACT to change these realities, we are allowing people made in God’s image to suffer injustice. And we are sinning.



“We do the Light a disservice when we underestimate the darkness. Jesus entered a world plagued not only by the darkness of individual pain and sin, but also by the darkness of systemic oppression.” (Christena Cleveland)



God saved us so that we might love and glorify him forever – and that includes eternal life. But Christ also saved us so that we can follow his example. So that we can step into the deep, systemic darkness around us and bring Light. We must acknowledge the darkness around us, so that we can bring the full power of the Light. God calls us to love and glorify him now through joining him in his larger redemption plan, which includes this world as well as heaven. We are saved that we might be who he created us to be and join him in the work he created us to do. Until we recognize this, we are not living in the full purpose he has for us.



This purpose includes living with a “holy discontent” – a burning in our hearts because we have a vision from Christ that there is something BETTER he desires for us and our world. A holy discontent that causes us to look at our cities and weep when we see pain or injustice, as Christ did when he looked over Jerusalem (Luke 19:41). We are called to feel the pain of ANY of our brothers and sisters who are suffering, who are living under ANY type of injustice. We are called to feel sickened, to weep, to fight, as Christ did. Christ’s love and compassion were so deep, his bravery and boldness so strong, that he walked to the cross. Let us be like Christ. Let us love with compassion, and let us fight with humility and steadfastness. Let us weep with those who weep, let us touch those who are hurting, let us listen to those who are grieving, let us upend tables in places of hypocrisy and speak boldly in the face of evil. Let us be willing to walk to the cross for our brothers and sisters.



“A scared world needs a fearless church.” (A.W. Tozer) In this time of Advent especially, we are called to show the world that Christ has come near. Immanuel, “God with us,” has saved us and shows us a new Way. Advent reminds us that one day he will return again, once and for all, and will make all things new. There will be no more prejudice or murder. But until then, we are to be his hands and feet, a foretelling of this reality, furthering His vision of renewal as much as we can while we are on this earth. In this time of Advent, we can show the world a glimpse of heaven - a glimpse of true peace and justice. We can bring Light into the darkness.


“The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of deep darkness a light has dawned.” - Isaiah 9:2


I grieve for Michael Brown, Eric Garner, and so many others. I grieve for the deep wrongs that exist in our country. But I believe, and am thankful, that right now during Advent the Church is poised to step out and lead in a clear way. We are poised to bring the Light, to bring Christ’s message of redemption and reconciliation, to proclaim that He has come and is coming again. So let’s do it.



Friends, let’s FIGHT. Not with weapons, but with our prayers and words and lifestyles. Let’s move, let’s be brave, let’s destroy injustice. Christ will return someday, and he will make all things right. Let’s be on His side when we see him face to face. Let’s join Him NOW, furthering His purposes on this earth, pointing to his healing grace. Let’s fight with all our hearts, using all the power and authority He has given us to make sure all people are treated justly and all people have the chance to live the full lives God desires for them. Let’s fight to make this world a little more the way God intended it. Let’s show this world a glimpse of what it will look like when Christ comes with fire and glory and completes his good work, destroying injustice and inequality once and for all.



“And he who was seated on the throne said, ‘Behold, I am making all things new.’”

Revelation 21:5



Look around – Aslan is on the move. Let’s join him.

Saturday, December 6, 2014

Vapor

I feel so deeply that it paralyzes me sometimes. And it's hard for me to express to others, even my husband, what is going on in those moments, in my mind and heart and soul. It's hard for me to even process and understand for myself what I'm feeling a lot of the time. But God has shown me that this is ok - He has made me this way for a reason, and I'm learning to let Him order my thoughts and work out these "deep feels" for His purposes. He's shown me that it's ok to sit for awhile, and bring the intense anger, pain, compassion, joy - whatever it is in that moment - before Him. It's ok to let myself be moved beyond expression, to go outside and look at beauty and cry. To listen to others express the things swirling around in my soul. This song is one of those things I go to when I don't know what to say. When I just need to be still for awhile. If you're like me, I highly recommend making space for yourself to do this, in whatever way you need to. I personally recommend putting this song on repeat:

"Vapor"
The Liturgists






Friday, November 21, 2014

A whisper

The voice of God is a holy whisper. And I am learning to listen:

The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.”
Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper..." (1 Kings 19:11-12)



And He was there.

Thursday, November 6, 2014

We long for Beauty


Our hearts long for something greater, something MORE. I feel this ache, this yearning, frequently. It's because God created us to know HIM, to know Something greater than this world has to offer. And it is when I am in creation that I feel this yearning most strongly, because all creation proclaims God's reality. It shouts of His glory. Even if we don't acknowledge Him, creation does. And our hearts feel a whisper, an echo of something ancient and deep and holy. When I am feeling anxious and falling into patterns of focusing on myself and my own little world, I am thankful for the moments of rest God gives me in creation - where my heart is reminded of the reality of something More and my soul is drawn back to the Glory that created us all.





"The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands....They have no speech, they use no words; no sound is heard from them. Yet their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world."
Psalm 19:1-4

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

When I'm pacing my office

There are moments throughout my day where I feel like my heart is going to burst - I want so badly to help every hurting child, hold anyone who is alone, stop any evil from happening. My heart aches for this. I feel it so strongly that I can't sit still and end up walking in circles in my office thinking and praying. I feel excited because I KNOW deep in my bones that these desires are from God....He created us for MORE than we see now. He created us to desire all to know the freedom that comes from His salvation. To desire peace and justice and the world to be made right. He created us for this other world, and so it is only right that I yearn for it now. And I know He is at work even now advancing His Kingdom, binding up wounds and healing hearts and destroying evil. And it is so exiting that we get to be a part of this. I think this is why I'm always wanting to do MORE and dreaming and having ideas and feeling hopeful, even when there are heartbreaking things happening in my life and around me. I am so thankful for this hope God gives me - gives all of us.

But the hard part is that there ARE still heartbreaking things happening around us. We can't heal every wound and stop every injustice from happening and protect every hurting child. Because we aren't Jesus. One day HE will make all things new. One day all will be as it should. We can see little glimpses of heaven, of His kingdom, of glory right now - through the salvation He offers us, through how He moves in lives and works justice in the most unjust places. I am so thankful for these glimpses. And those moments when I am pacing my office or sitting overwhelmed in my apartment (sorry Stephen) and just want to DO and GO and ACT, I need to remember that we are living in the "now and not yet" - the God of eternity is moving in us and among us to further his purposes, but his Kingdom is not here yet.

So until it is, I will run "further up and further in" (Narnia reference of course), doing the little part He asks me to do, seeking to love fiercely and wholeheartedly each day, by His power. And those moments I can't sit still and my heart aches for more, I'll focus on those glimpses of glory I see now - through what God is doing in my own life, through the beautiful lives of my friends and family and the church as a whole, all over. And I'll remember that He is coming soon to bring all creation to completion.

Then I'll get back to work. (Or go to bed, depending on what time of day it is.)

Friday, August 15, 2014

What to do when feeling sick to your stomach

I have always felt a deep, unmoving call to love and work with the most vulnerable. And since the start of our marriage, my husband and i together have shared that vision and felt that passion.
But the past couple years, as we've actually been DOING that - in relationships with people who are different than us, loving the hurting - it has been HARD.


Loving the vulnerable is HARD. 

LOVING is hard. Period. It makes us vulnerable ourselves.

As I've sought to love the broken, vulnerable people around me over the past couple years....and as my heart has been breaking recently from experiences of family members close to me...and as my heart breaks for the situations going on in the world around me and in my own city....I've been close to breaking. There are so many days I don't know how to reconcile the blessings in my own life with the brokenness and suffering all around me. There are days where I just feel sick to my stomach.

But even as I've experienced these low, sick, panicked days, God has graciously opened my blurry eyes to more of Himself.....and allowed me to experience just as many deep, peaceful, quiet moments of truth. I want to try to share some of those of truths, for those of you who might feel a lot like me some days (I'll attempt to be brief....):
 

* Remember grace. We don't deserve anything we have - our life, our salvation, our earthly blessings - but because of His unmerited favor He has blessed us with much. It is not up to me how much I have or how much others have. He has made me who I am and given me what I have, by His grace. And I can look to the example of Christ and live out His grace as He asks me: weeping with those who mourn, sitting with the brokenhearted, using the blessings and power He has given me to defend and advocate and show His grace to those hurting and oppressed. As Paul said, "By the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect." (1 Cor. 15:10)

* Remember the character of our God. He is a God who loves us so deeply that He gave His own life for us. He is a God who, in Christ, sought out the most broken, messed-up, left out people and chose to sit with them. He chose to laugh and eat and hang out with those who society had forgotten, deemed as gross or too sinful or messed up. He loves us - each of us, in our weirdest, most messed up, left out moments where we feel so unloved and unaccepted by anyone else. As with the blind man in Luke 18, Jesus ALWAYS comes back for those others leave behind. He ALWAYS comes when we call. His heart is tender and compassionate towards us. And He is POWERFUL - one look from Him and the most powerful men in His time were silenced. No one dared touch anyone He defended. One sentence from Him turned away the most powerful evil. This is our Savior, the God we can walk with and whose power we can share in today.

* Christ is love, and "love always hopes" (1 Cor. 13:7). As a visionary and a passionate idealist, i know sometimes people mistake this hope for naivety. But as hard as the past couple years have been at times, and even now as I am discouraged and heartbroken by people and things going around in the world around us, Christ whispers His truth to my heart: love ALWAYS hopes. In Him, all things are being made new and He is at work powerfully all around us, in us, and through us. He is POWERFUL and He wants to use US to be "Repairer of Broken Walls" (Is. 58:12). He wants to use US to remind this hurting, broken world that in His love, there is always HOPE. Never feel naive for believing this - it's the truth.

* Faithfulness. God calls us to faith-fullness. Not to change the world, not to see fruit in everything we touch or success (whatever that even looks like anyway) in all our efforts and relationships. I'm realizing, and still learning, each day is that what God calls us to is just to be faithful. Faithful to Him, to walking "a long obedience in the same direction." I'm understanding deep in my heart, more and more each day, that faith is not knowing God's plan. It is loving our Savior and choosing to walk with Him each day down his path, even if we don't know where it leads. No matter how hard it might be, or what He asks of us. He just asks us to be faithful, to follow Him - not to put the whole world on our shoulders and wear ourselves into the ground everyday trying to save it - instead He asks us to quietly walk with him and let Him take us "further up, further in" (CS Lewis), trusting His power and might to strengthen us along the way. As a dear friend (shout out to Lauren Zumbrun) recently wrote, "...having faith is not following a life that we understand, it is being present in the place we are in, trusting in our Creator, and having the capacity to love well despite what circumstances may be."

* Joy. Knowing Him is joy. And we are blessed to live life and breath each day and join His redemptive work in this world in whatever way He calls us to. No matter how discouraging or sad or heartbreaking some days might be. On those days I feel like I want to scream...when I feel the heartache of the world and my family and my friends and everything pressin
g down on me until I almost can't breathe...Something pulls me back. And either through the soft words of my husband, truth spoken by a friend, or seeing the glory of a sunset reflected on the water, He reminds me of the deep JOY that comes from knowing His holiness and walking with Him. It is in Him that we live and move and have our being. It is in Him that we can know true joy despite the darkness all around us, to have the freedom to laugh and run and dream and love without fear of that darkness ever truly reaching us. If it reaches us for a moment (or even for years), we have a hope that goes beyond those years.
 

* It's ok to cry and be heartbroken. I've experienced firsthand that it's possible to be anxious and sad while at the same time still believing in the ultimate hope of Christ. This is life. And in the moments we feel most anxious and sad, its important to be honest about this and vulnerable with people who can empathize, support, encourage, and even get us the more tangible help we might need as we go about doing God's work. A pastor friend of mine (shout out to John Carroll) recently described it beautifully this way: so many of us fall into the pattern of living our days just preparing for the "other shoe to drop" - fearing what might happen, doing all we can to prevent pain or disaster, and spending our time looking ahead in anxiety, missing all that God is doing now. But God never says that if we stress enough about tomorrow, hard times won't come. Instead, He promises to be there when the shoe inevitably will drop, walking with us and showing us more of Himself in those moments. He invites us to a new pattern - one where we live passionately, trusting Him in a deeper way. Where we have bad days and cry on His shoulder, but where we ultimately trust His presence to carry us through tomorrow, whatever it may bring - and live fully in Him today.

* It's hard to admit this, because I've genuinely had a very blessed life - but I've realized the past couple years that even though I feel called to help and defend the most hurting and vulnerable, I am hurting too. I am vulnerable too. I need God's grace and mercy too. More than ever, just as much as the people I feel called to help. The more I've felt God's love for others, the more I've realized how broken and vulnerable I am. And that's good - it doesn't mean I'm disqualified from doing what I feel called to do; it's the opposite in fact. I've realized that the more I understand my own hurt and sadness, and how much I need Someone to help and defend me, the more my heart yearns to love and defend others. My passion and calling only grows stronger. As Christ has done for me, my heart yearns to do for others - to love as He first loved me. And more than anything, to help others see the true Rescuer.


So friends, as we go about our days, remember:

"He is before all things, and in him all things hold together....he has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation— if you continue in your faith, established and firm, and do not move from the hope held out in the gospel." (Col. 1:17, 22)