Thinking less of me

I haven't written in a awhile. Although there has been no shortage of things I've been thinking about and itching to sit down and write about, I have purposefully taken the times I would have written to instead spend more time thinking and praying through things. I am quick to write, to speak, to get my thoughts out there. But God has been impressing on me more than ever the incredible importance of sitting in HIs presence, of listening, of praying through things, of truly seeking His truth and being content to wait for an answer - not always feel like I have to give an opinion or an answer.

As I've been intentionally focusing on listening, on waiting, and just in general on God and not myself, He has led me to see the beauty in this prayer and to make it my own:

"O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love"(prayer of St. Francis)

I've realized that so often the things I am quick to write and say, often even the things I say to God, are out of a desire to be known, loved, justified, understood, etc...it is for me, about me, focused on me, my life, my purpose, my reputation...and as I’ve been learning to think of the Father more, of the beauty of Christ and the reality of His glory, of His selfless love and what that love means for my life, I have begun to realize in new ways that my purpose is to love, console, understand, think of, and pray for others - I just don’t need to be the focus. And I have become happier, more joyful, more peaceful, more in love with God than ever, the less i have focused on myself and the more I have focuses on what He has created me for: loving Him and love others. Praying for others to live in the same peace I know in Christ. Thinking less of my own reputation, happiness, and status, and desiring love for others. So this is my prayer now daily, my desire for my life: God, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love."