Different

There are no words to describe the beauty, the holiness of marriage – the sacredness of knowing I am one with another person, that for the rest of our lives it is us together, living in God’s brilliant plan for this world.

What God has already reminded me of so much just through one week of marriage is that we are DIFFERENT. We are ALL meant to be different.

Just through one week of marriage God has shown me so much more of Himself and His incredibly massive vision for this world. It is grander than anything I could imagine, bigger than my little life. God, by His grace, wants to use Stephen and me to join this glorious adventure, this vision that has been the same since Adam and Moses and Esther – this vision to save the world. And it’s going to look so different - more amazing - than anything I could ever imagine.

The magic of being united with Stephen has helped me see that. I think our human habit is to fall into routine, into what it comfortable. It is to follow prototypes and examples of what is “right” that have been laid out before us by other “good” people. But there is no “prototype” for the unearthly, beautiful dreams of God. The heartbeat He is molding our hearts to feel is to a rhythm unlike any other. We are called to close our eyes and believe something bigger, something greater than we have ever seen before.

I completely believe that we should look to those that have gone before for wisdom and guidance. I believe wholeheartedly that there are some that are called to follow certain paths. But I have seen that taken to the extreme and abused, and have seen passionate, fiery people “calmed down” by the mold they were forced to fit. Get married, have kids, go to church, maybe work in youth ministry….none of these things are wrong, but if they are done simply because it is what is expected – because it is what is “good” and comfortable – and not because it is the calling of God to bring His glory and salvation into the world, then it is wrong. I believe there is more, there is something different and beautiful and fascinating that God has called each of us to that will blow our minds if we would believe that He wants to use us in this amazing huge vision. The girl crying in the brothel, the boy with no food, the parents who don’t talk anymore, the man in your office who gets quieter every day – God wants to change their lives with His love and make this world different and wants us to wake up everyday believing it can happen and believing that just like Moses, God desires us to stand up and declare FREEDOM for His people.

For some reason, God has given me a passion for government and the power it has to bring about real change if used in the right way. I have a deep interest in politics and advocacy and helping God’s people through these avenues. But I also love working with people, discussing theology, counseling others, and helping guide them to know more of God and His purposes. The past few years as I’ve been praying for God to show me His will for my life, I’ve though, because the world has told me, that I had to choose one path or the other, one passion or the other. But through my relationship with Stephen and God opening my eyes to more of His incredible, mind-blowing purpose for us in this world, I am realizing my life is supposed to look different. Just because I like working with kids, being around people, and having deep conversations doesn’t mean I have to have kids at age 23 and work with youth the rest of my life. I believe with my whole heart that God has given me a passion for government, advocacy, and political change for a reason. I believe He wants to use that just as much as He wants to use my love of people to change the world. But that doesn’t mean I can only work on Capitol Hill the rest of my life either – God is bigger than black and white, one or the other. And I believe He led me to a man who perfectly balances out the gifts He has given me with his own passions and talents – a man who perfectly completes the vision God has for us.

It’s scary because that vision is so beyond me. I can’t understand it and I don’t know how it will look. The path Steve and I are called to take is different. I am a political science major with a passion for politics who is working at a summer camp. I am married to a teacher who knows more about how to teach people than anyone I have ever met. We feel led to China, Scotland, the inner-city, the streets of Capitol Hill, the halls of nursing homes, churches, classrooms, seminaries…..

And all of it is for His glory – it is part of a wider, deeper, and more glorious picture than we will ever know. But we are called into it. We are not called to live our lives just for the sake of living them, or to fulfill a certain role or goal for ourselves. I am not called down a certain path because that is what I “should do” or because that is what makes the most sense or makes Stephen and I look the best. We are called to a higher way, a holy perspective. Everyone should look DIFFERENT. All of us should go down a path forged by a fiery passion for the vision of the redeeming love of Christ being brought onto this earth, a vision of His saving glory making this world the way God intended it to be before time began.

It is this vision that should drive us. It that leads us to a pretty normal looking life, then praise God – if the perspective is right then it is RIGHT. But nothing – nothing different or “normal” should be done with the motive of self, of comfort, of normalcy. We are called to empty ourselves, and we are called to this for a reason: the less we think of ourselves and the more we look to the throne room of God and desire His glory on this earth, the more we will pour out His love that is consuming fire, and the faster it will sweep over this pitiful, dying world. The more we desire His Way and keep the vision of Moses, Isaiah, and Paul, the vision that we are created for something more and live for something more – the vision that brings salvation – the more we let this be our perspective, the more we will look DIFFERENT. We can have PEACE in His greater plan, even though we may never see the whole picture ourselves. His love “surpasses knowledge” (Eph. 3:19), but we can LIVE it.